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I caught my inside-my-head voice speaking like Gordon Ramsay today while I was looking for an envelope. I've been watching a lot of the BBC's Kitchen Nightmares since I discovered the joys of the Gordon Ramsay a couple of months ago, so it's understandable that my inundated brain is getting a bit...enamoured. But how could I not love Gordon Ramsay? Let us count the ways...
1. Gordon Ramsay takes his shirt off in every episode of Kitchen Nightmares that I've ever seen. Sure, he has to change into his chef's jacket (with apparently no undershirt,) but he makes sure the camera gets a nice shot of his bare chest while doing so. The funny thing is, though, that on one episode, he changed into his chef's jacket twice, but the second time, we got no chest shot. It's like during the Dick Van Dyke show and Mary Tyler Moore was only allowed to wear her tight pants once every episode so as not to offend the censors.
2. Gordon Ramsay encourages young chefs. The Boyfriend and I always joke about his boy crush for each episode, because he does tend to take a young man (or "big boy") under his wing, so to speak. And there is often hair ruffling and and horseplay and a little winkwinknudgenudge going on. But, although Gordon doesn't hold back when listing their faults, he also gives them chances to show their stuff and plenty of encouragement when he thinks they have promise. And he hardly ever poaches them from the restaurant. Hey, he apologized for that!
3. Gordon Ramsay is not afraid to carry a fat french woman into the ocean whilst he is fully clothed.
4. Gordon Ramsay knows that there is no #4.
5. Gordon Ramsay looks adorable with baby sheep. And then he makes them delicious.
6. Gordon Ramsay doesn't bullshit. You know he revels in a good fight (and I'm not ashamed to admit that it gets me kind of hot when he gets into a shouting match,) and he doesn't pull any punches, but he makes good points, and he takes pleasure in things going well. I always root for the restaurant to turn things around, because it really makes me happy when Gordon goes back and enjoys his meal. He gets a big smile on his face and congratulates everyone. Hey, the fighting and insulting makes for great tv, but the pride makes for warm and fuzzy tv, and then we all win.
7. Gordon Ramsay promotes local products. Local produce, local seafood, local meats. It's not just a good marketing plan and a cost saving deal for the restaurant, and it doesn't just help the local community, it helps the whole PLANET. That's right, Gordon Ramsay loves our planet. Gordon Ramsay and Phillipe Cousteau. Mmm...Phillipe Cousteau...
8. Gordon Ramsay makes me want to run a restaurant. And he makes me think I can do it. I can't, of course, let's not be ridiculous. But I look at some of those idiots and think, hell, I can do better than that. I can at least make creme brulee that doesn't look like baby vomit. That's all I'm sayin'.
Yes, I love me some Gordon Ramsay I only regret that it took me so long to discover this love. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have three seasons of Hell's Kitchen to catch up on.
For as long as I can remember, Ozzie Smith has been one of my all-time biggest heroes. When I was a child, my favorite day of baseball season was Opening Day, when Ozzie would do his trademark backflip when he took the field. I'm still bitter about the day in middle school that my mother did not let me skip class to meet Ozzie at the sports store he was signing autographs at during school hours. And I still have the piece of paper I did finally get his autograph on at a game the next year. For most of my pre-adolescent and adolescent years, I had a poster of Ozzie hanging above my bed. I collected every card I could find of him, especially one special purchase of his Padres rookie card. And I still have them all. And of course I read his auto-biography! And this is one childhood hero that has not diminished in my mind. One of the coolest things about living in St. Louis now is that the theatre I've been working at is in the same complex as Ozzie's restaurant. And he's there sometimes. I've seen him a couple of times, and I totally got excited the day he said hi to me. Well, today I got to let him into the theatre to look around. And I felt like a giddy little girl again when he looked at me, sm
iled and said hi. And can I say that he is just the most adorable man ever?
So here's to childhood heroes that remain on their pedestals!
My first summer stage managing at summer stock, one of my shows was You're a Good Man, Charlie Brown. It was a fun show, great experience, taught me a lot, etc, etc. But when I moved away from home, what I remembered most was the silly song Happiness Is. It's the finale of the show, filled with what makes the Peanuts' gang happy. You know, eating an ice cream, catching a firefly, setting it freeeeeee. Anyway, when I moved away from home, and I got scared and depressed, I would write a "Happiness Is" entry in my journal. The only rule was that it had to be something that happened to me or I did in the past few days, because if you're grasping at happiness straws from a couple of weeks ago, then you need to do something to correct that ASAP. I've had a real rough couple of days, so, without further ado, my first Happiness Is blog:
Happiness is...
1. Gordon Ramsey. He has to take his shirt off on camera at least once every episode. Do you think it's written in his contract?
2. Drinking whiskey with a good friend. Even when someone else joins you and you don't get to whine about what you wanted to whine about. Especially when you end up not paying.
3.
Like, seriously? I will keep this episode of Lost on my DVR for as long as I possibly can. Technically, it was 6 days ago that this Sayid-centric episode was delivered to me, but as I watched it again today, it totally gets counted as a Happiness Is for today.
Mmmmm...
4. There is no number 4.
5. Cold Brewed Green Tea. Thank you, Beth.
6. Yummy frozen pizza. Thank you, Kashi.
7. New, seriously comfortable socks. Thank you, Adidas.
8. Someone telling me they love me. Thank you, Beth and my sister.
9. My cat, Suki, who will generally come when called, even when she was comfortable, and will stay put when you pet her.
10. Did I mention
11. Bacon. Happiness is definitely bacon.
I have been unemployed since December 30th. This is not easy for me, being unemployed. I won't lie to you - I'd love to be independently wealthy and not have to work for a living, but since I'm not, I'd rather be productive than not. My previous unemployment periods have been few and far between and brief, and right now it's even worse, since I'm in a relationship. How can I hold my own in this relationship when I can't pay for nights out, can't ask for nights out because of my guilt for being unable to pay, and can't even pay rent at the moment? Lucky I can cook, or I'd wonder what I'm even offering this relationship right now. My days recently have been filled with pajama wearing, tv watching, sorry feeling (for myself) patheticness. But I am sending my resume out! (The above actions are not listed amongst my "Skills," but I am awfully good at them. You need five hours of Murder, She Wrote and Good Eats watched straight through? I'm your girl!)
At any rate, that's not what this post is about. For those of you (Beth) that I have not been ashamed to talk to lately, you know where I've been. This post is about the light at the end of the tunnel. I commiserated tonight with my bowling partner and former assistant stage manager, who is in somewhat the same situation as I (though not as bad, because he has good non-theatre experience and opportunities) and he likened this time period to getting a shot at the Doctor's office. And what does the Dr. always say? "This will only hurt for a minute." In the vast span of my life (hopefully,) this period of unemployment despair will end up being but a pinprick. And as much as I should know that anyway, hearing someone else tell me that, with conviction, makes all the difference. I've never thought I would not get another job in my chosen field, but some times are harder than others, and I do tend to get bogged down, like Atreyu in The Never Ending Story. But I will become a productive member of society again (hopefully sooner, rather than later.) And I am determined to remember that now.
Now, if you'll excuse me, Ramsey's Kitchen Nightmares is on. And I've only seen this episode once (this week.)
